Basiliso has been a caregiver since his parents began to age. In 2019, his mother broke her ankle and was placed in a care home, where her health continued to decline. Basiliso brought her into his home so he could provide the care she needed until she passed away in 2020. Shortly thereafter, he became a long-distance caregiver to his father following a kidney transplant. Traveling between his home in Delaware and his father’s home in New York was exhausting as well as expensive. Basiliso brought his father to live with him in Delaware.
As an only child, Basiliso had always helped his parents with the tasks they needed to manage daily life, and he often felt like a caregiver long before he had the language for it. He began to fully recognize the extent of his caregiving responsibilities when he moved in with his parents after his divorce, and took on managing bills and household tasks.
Basiliso is a “sandwich caregiver,” caring for father and his own children. He finds it challenging to help others understand what sandwich caregiving truly involves. Caring for both his father and children requires significant time, energy, and coordination, and when that work is misunderstood, support often falls short. He struggled with finding support until he met his then girlfriend and now wife, who is able to watch his children when he needs to be fully present with his father. Basiliso also struggles to balance his caregiving responsibilities with his full-time job.
Basiliso encounters these challenges not only in his own life as a caregiver, but also in his work as a financial social worker. He supports and educates people of color in the sandwich generation who are balancing caregiving responsibilities with financial strain. Through both his personal and professional experience, Basiliso understands how critical it is for the sandwich generation to be seen, understood, and provided with the support they need.
“I find I keep having to explain what the Sandwich generation is to people. I’m young Gen X, so Gen X and Millennials – it’s happening more and more. We have our own kids we take care of, but we’re starting to have to take care of our parents as well. Welcome to the Sandwich generation.”