Abby, a social worker from Maryland, began her caregiving journey at the age of nine when her grandmother suffered a brain aneurysm. By the time Abby turned 11, she became her grandma’s primary caregiver.
Though Abby came from a financially stable family, the caregiving role still fell on her. Her parents and other siblings had to return to work to support their own households while also covering the added costs of their grandparents’ mortgage and medical bills. In the end, they could not afford an in-home health aid, leaving Abby as the only one available to care for her grandmother. Caregiving can happen to anyone.
As a young caregiver, Abby often found that her role was misunderstood or not taken seriously. Employers and college professors questioned why she needed time off to care for her grandmother, and in medical appointments, doctors directed questions to her grandfather, who didn’t have the answers, instead of asking Abby, who managed her grandmother’s care.
Abby also felt deeply isolated. She didn’t know what resources were available, and she didn’t know anyone else her age providing care. It wasn’t until a college course defined caregivers by the tasks they perform that Abby realized she had been acting as her grandmother’s caregiver all along. Recognizing herself as a caregiver opened the door to new resources, validation, and a deeper understanding of her role.
Abby became a social worker because she is determined to offer the comfort, understanding, and resources she lacked as a caregiver to others walking the same path. Supporting caregivers is ongoing work, and she believes it is worth continuing to fight for meaningful change. Small wins sustain her hope that progress is possible. She hopes that in twenty years, she can look back with pride at the advances made for the caregivers of the future.
“It [caregiving] felt really isolating at the time because I didn’t know there was anyone else around doing care work. Of course, now I do know, but I think it’s important to make people aware that anyone could be a caregiver, it’s not exclusive to a specific group.”
“Everything we need to care for my grandma cost so much that we couldn’t hire an in-home health aide because it couldn’t be afforded. My parents and older siblings had to go to work, and I liked hanging out with grandma and grandpa, so I was around. And slowly but surely, I picked up more responsibilities.”